Note to self

The Challenge:

Scrap-Challenge-Yourself #22

I started playing along with Scrap-Challenge-Yourself last month following the lead from my blog friend Sharon, and I tell myself, making ONE 12x12 layout a month probably not too much for me, so I  am here for the 2nd layout for the challenge.

Here's the sketch....

and here's my layout....

NOTE to SELF:

Be soft. Do not let the world made you hard. 

Do not let pain make you hate.

DO not let the bitterness steal your sweetness.

Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree,

you still believe it to be a beautiful place.

As a Singaporean living overseas for more than 14 years, I long for the friendship of my fellow Singaporean, whether in New York City or Las Vegas, I want to find a group of Singapore to share our food, tradition, and speak our familiar "Singlish".

When we first moved here 5 years ago, I couldn't find any Singaporean group or club to join, through a friend from NYC, I finally met a group here called SAN (Singapore Association of Nevada). I was very happy and excited. A year later, the people in the group asked if I would take over the leadership and be the president of the club, they knew that I had many years experience serving the club in NYC, and thought that I could bring the club to a new level. I am not a power seeker, and like to be low key all the time, with the support of my husband, he also thought that I am the right person to take the position, not just for my experience but I seem to be the only person that do not have a full time job at that time, so I accepted.

I put all my heart and soul into the club, SAN's website had an internet presence one month after I took over, our membership increased and event attendees doubled after I became the president. I brought in sponsors for our events and applied for funding from our government, for the first time, the members  paid a subsidized price when we dined at the local restaurant for major events. Little that I know one member Jennifer was eye-sored for my achievement and felt that she had lost her "power", she started to find fault with everything I do, last November, the trouble finally surfaced. I had an email argument with her when she became too unreasonable, and next thing she do is to called members and started to gossip, for me, I am NEW to the club, but for them, they were together for more than 20 years, so a lot of them just take sides without even hear me out (of course, I didn't behave like her and gossip so nobody really know what's going on behind the scene), the matter gotten worst and Jennifer even said that she wants to be the next president when my two years term is over, and for one condition - Kirsty and Randy has to be kick out of the club, I was like, what did I do wrong? All my contribution to the club is selfless, I do not gain anything but give my time and effort, and money from my own pocket. Well, this thing has taken a lot of energy from me and DH's advice is, take the high road and let it go, let Jennifer do whatever she wants and we just step aside, so I did. After the handover in August, we left. It breaks my heart that I can't be with my fellow Singapore when comes to major holidays like Chinese New Year, Singapore National Day etc. It pains me when people do not see what the truth is but to take sides blindly. It hurts me even more when I think that this is what I get for being selflessly volunteering my service to the club just because I love my country and my people? Sometimes I get very angry that there is no justice and I was mistreated, when times like that, I remind myself - Be kind, be soft, do not let bad people change who I am.

so here you are - I finally let it out here on my blog. The wound is still new, I still try to avoid things like not going to my facebook page, because it is where they would post thing and photos about the event and gathering, that makes me sad...... I am making a small step here by "talking" about it, I hope this is another baby step towards my healing.

Thanks for reading!